The best breakfast

I finally found a granola recipe that is quick and easy to make - no tedious removing from the oven to stir every five minutes - and which doesn't require me to hand over my entire month's food budget to Holland and Barrett in order to buy ingredients: this recipe - from the brilliant Jack Monroe.  

• The recipe uses ingredients that I always have in the house: oats, peanut butter, honey and a little pat of butter.  That's it.
• It took me about 2 minutes to mix and then just 15 minutes to cook.
• It made the whole house smell amazing while it baked.
• Cam did a quality control test once it was cooled, and I had to physically remove the spoon from his hand in order to stop him from eating the WHOLE BATCH.

Granola jars

 

I had some for breakfast this morning with yogurt, banana and fridge jam.  It was one of the nicest breakfasts I've had in months.

A very fine breakfast

The fridge jam is a cross between a sauce and a jam.  It needs to be kept in the fridge, and is a lovely thing to have on hand as the basis for a fruity breakfast, a smoothie or a pudding.  This one is made from half a punnet of blackcurrants - left over from an enthusiastic session at the PYO farm last week - a few shakes of caster sugar, and two tablespoons of water.  I put everything in a pan, brought it to the boil, and left it to bubble for a few minutes before cooling and putting it in a clean jar. 

Blackcurrant fridge jam

It is nice and sharp, and a wonderful colour.  You can make this from any fruit, but berries and stone fruits work particularly well.  The key to making fridge jam is just to use a very small spoonful or two of water in your mixture.  Proper jam uses much more sugar and no water; stewed fruit (or fruit compote) uses less sugar but more water - fridge jam falls somewhere in the middle.  

I love blackcurrants so much - such an interesting, feisty fruit.  This jar of them tastes  like distilled summer.      

Oncology experiences

The longest placement of our course is for twelve weeks, towards the end of our third year.  We can ask to be placed in a particular specialism, and the university and the hospitals it partners with try to accommodate our requests.  I asked for oncology, and was given it.

It was a tough placement.  So much is expected of us by this stage in our course.  Our mentors are assessing whether or not they are happy for us to join the register of nurses, and we are acutely aware that in a few weeks or months (if our mentors are satisfied with our abilities) we will be newly qualified and practising independently.  We are trying to learn as much as possible while we still can, but also prove that we already know how to be safe and work as a graduate nurse.  We have seen so much by this stage of our course (after a Saturday night shift in A&E I truly thought I'd seen everything) - but of course we haven't seen or experienced a fraction of what there is to see.  People's bodies and minds still shock and surprise me.  This placement was when I properly understood that I will never stop learning.

And then there is oncology itself.  Cancer is a very complex disease that evolves and changes over time.  It can be cured and managed better than ever before - but not always.  It affects everybody differently, and touches a person's family, friends and lifestyle too.  

In my first week on the ward, one of the Macmillan Nurse Specialists said that I must make sure to spend a morning with her in one of the outpatient clinics before the end of the placement.  "You will get a very one-sided view of cancer by working on a ward," she told me.  It wasn't until the penultimate week of my placement that I got a chance to take her up on her invitation and join her in the outpatient clinic.  On the ward I cared for people who were very sick - either because their disease had progressed and they were close to end of life, or because the treatment they were receiving was making them extremely unwell, even though it may have been killing the cancer.  However, in the clinic I met a much greater number of patients who were either living a completely full life with cancer and whose symptoms were completely under control, or whose cancer had been cured or removed - by the often harrowing treatment we gave on the ward - and who had been in remission for many years.  Many of these people were the beneficiaries of the enormous amount of reasearch and experimentation that goes into oncology in this country.  It was helpful to be reminded that the very unwell people I was nursing on the ward, were just a small proportion of the number of people affected by the disease.


I had so much to think about and a great deal to say while I was on placement on this ward, but was unable to express it - partly due to confidentiality, but also because there was just so much to process in my mind.  I took even more photos than usual on my commutes, and tried to spend the time on the train really focusing on my nursing skills, and reflecting on my new life as a nurse.  I didn't get enough sleep because the shift pattern on this ward was unusually relentless, and I didn't run for the same reason.  To be able to give of yourself - as you need to do when you are a nurse, and in many other professions - you need to be able to look after yourself too.  I ended the placement with a new determination to make more time for running, sleeping, reading magazines and baking cakes - all those good things which recharge my batteries and keep me content. 

Although I'm not going to be working in oncology when I qualify, I wonder if it might be something I return to at some point in my career.  As well as being the toughest placement I've done, it was also one of the most satisfying.  I had days where I came out of work on such a high because I knew I'd left patients feeling better at the end of the shift because of something I'd done.  And quite simply, that's what it's all about.

   

A floral Japanese dress

A couple of weeks ago, I made a second Japanese dress (here is the first one, which turned out to be a tunic for reasons of public decency).  This time I added 16cm to the length and  graded the side seams so that it continued the full, swingy shape.  This one is the perfect dress length for me - it falls a couple of centimetres above the knee.

I bought the fabric from Stitch in Wanstead, which is a wonderful fabric shop specialising in dressmaking fabrics.  The staff in this shop have so much knowledge, and are happy for fabric ditherers like me to prowl around the shop for hours before finally purchasing something.  It is a cotton lawn, with a fine, light crispness which I love, and only cost me £8 a metre (I bought 3m to be cautious, but totally could have got away with 2.5m).  This makes the dress incredibly good value.

I absolutely love how the dress turned out, and I wear it often (as I do the first tunic-length attempt, which looks great over jeans or leggings).  The shape is full, but there are enough details to make it look stylish and not sack-like.  The pleated bodice is particularly pleasing.  This time I added a narrow velvet ribbon hem on the bottom, which is definitely my favourite way of finishing a hem on a dress, tunic or skirt (I learnt the technique many years ago, from this free Oliver + S skirt pattern).  Both this dress, and also the first tunic version, have attracted so many flattering comments from random people on the train - and even two policewomen walking past me in the street.   I love how both the style and the fabric are such a long way from anything you'd ever find in a shop. 

For my birthday, my father gave me a second dress pattern book by Yoshiko Tsukiori (this one), and I have spent a great deal of time happily immersing myself in the book, and deciding what I want to make next.  This one, pictured below, is the most likely contender simply because of the delicious neckline. 

This stage of planning and thinking is possibly one of the most enjoyable parts of dressmaking for me.  By the time I am ready to sew I have a very definite idea in my head of how the garment is going to turn out.  Then I'm just so eager to get on with the sewing so that I can start wearing it.      

Messy desk - a snapshot

On my messy desk this morning:

• the milk bill
• a letter from Olivia's school about a summer picnic
• a free cup of coffee from Waitrose - thank you Waitrose
• three unopened magazines
• this week's Nursing Standard
• a leaflet about pelvic radiotherapy in men
• unexpected Amazon parcels, which I think may contain birthday presents
• a new cookbook
• a textbook on acute and critical care nursing
• my Kindle - I need to load it up with more things to read later; I've just finished this book, which was a good recommendation from my father
• keys and glasses
• fabric for another dress
• a freshly baked croissant in a paper bag (my breakfast, along with the coffee)

It is my day off today.  After I've tidied my desk I plan to sit in the garden and read the backlog of magazines and my new cookbook. 

10 things

The nice thing about getting an exciting new job in ITU, is that nothing really changes:

• I made a new top.  It was meant to be a dress, but I failed to adjust for the fact that I am much taller than most Japanese women.

• I love it though, and have bought more fabric so I can make myself a dress version.

• I discovered that the best place to take a full legth photo of myself without balancing on the arm of a sofa or having to tidy an entire room first, is the changing room at work. 

• Basil is back in the kitchen - I run my hands through it when I stand at the sink.

• I like these tiles at Aldgate station.

• Graham is listening to James Brown and treating us all to funk.

• I have been running - but not enough.  I miss it.

• I baked brioche rolls, and Graham made a tarte au citron. 

• The washing machine couldn't read the label that said the pillow was washable.

• When it's sunny, and I am not at work, I cycle over to the Olympic park with a quilt and sunbathe.    

A new identity

A few weeks ago I was offered my first nursing job - and last week, after much dithering, I accepted it.  At the end of this year I will become a registered nurse, and then I will be working on the ITU at my local hospital.  ITU stands for Intensive Therapy Unit and is what used to be known as Intensive Care - it is where the very sickest patients are cared for, and each patient gets one-to-one nursing care, 24 hours a day.  I have so many emotions whirling around my head about this new job:

• pride - I've got a great job, in a specialism I desperately wanted to work in
• fear - I'm going to be a qualified nurse, responsible for the care of very poorly patients
• excitement - I'm going to be a qualified nurse, responsible for the care of very poorly patients
• motivation - I need to revise all my knowledge of acute nursing care, and learn so much more
• eagerness - I want to start now
• sartorial disappointment - I will be wearing scrubs rather than a traditional nursing uniform
• nervousness - can we put the brakes on, please? I've loved being back at University.

But mainly, with the knowledge that I have a good job waiting for me at the end of the year, I have relaxed and started to enjoy myself more.  I have always enjoyed nursing and been certain that this was what I wanted to do, but there has also been an underlying tension - could I really do this?  could I be good at this?  what effect was my change in career having on the family?  I was surprised to find that this tension disappeared when I finally sent the email to accept the job.

"Yes, I have a job in ITU," I tell people.  I'm getting used to saying it.  I have a new identity.  In my head I say to myself "I am an ITU nurse" - trying it out for size - and it feels right.

 

Commuting

I have the nicest commute at the moment.  I work strange hours so I'm never travelling at peak times, which means the tubes are not too rammed; most of the time I can get a seat.  I just have to travel six stops, and I can get from home to work in about half an hour.  

The hospital is in the City - an area of London that I know very well because I worked there when I was an accountant for many years.  I find myself taking out my phone and snapping pictures every day, because this part of London is just so photogenic.

A top in blue voile

As well as the children's exams, I am also starting a new placement and embarking on the nerve wracking process of job hunting at the moment.  

On a day off on Monday I decided the best thing I could do to create some calm and light relief in my week was to embark on some sewing.  Inspired by all the beautiful clothes appearing in my Instagram feed for Me Made May (and especially those put up by Liesl and Suse), I cut into my precious piece of Anna Maria Horner's Little Folks voile and made myself another Lisette market dress tunic.  I wear both the ones I made earlier in the year constantly; they look so good with trousers and a cardi or a scarf.

The voile is sumptuous - soft, drapey, feminine and luxurious.  It is also surprisingly non-sweary to sew with.  It feels as though it should slither all over my table, but it doesn't.  Pleasingly I also found a length of narrow velvet ribbon which my grandmother had given me, in exactly the right shade of yellow to match the centre of the flowers on the fabric, so I hemmed the top with that.

A happy few hours sewing, and a luxurious-feeling new blue top.  I just wish it was easier to find a place in my house to take full length photos of myself (and a clean mirror!).

Exam food

The children both have exams this week.  Olivia has her Year 6 SATs - four consecutive mornings of maths and English exams - and Cam has his first two biology GCSE exams; his third exam is in a few weeks' time.  They're taking it all in their stride, but I know that they're tired and tense too.  This feels like the start of many, many years of exams-in-May as they each work their way through GCSEs, AS levels and A levels (and beyond).

Cam, flopped on the sofa after a day at school and two hours of revision

I expanded the family rule of "When someone has a birthday, they choose what the family has for supper", to "When someone has a birthday or does an exam, they choose what the family has for supper".  Tonight we had Olivia's choice of beefburgers (nice, juicy quarterpounder steak burgers from Waitrose), oven chips, and rather specifically "carrots cut like coins, not sticks".  Very nice.  I don't often cook burgers so this felt like the treat it was meant to be.  Much ketchup was applied.

Cam's choice, which we are having on Friday, is lasagna, garlic bread and sweetcorn.  I don't often make a lasagna as it feels like too much faff at the end of a long day, so again this will be a special treat.  I love how both their choices are simple, slightly retro and not at all the sort of thing I normally cook.

My contribution has been to make them orange-scented buns for after school - I think they definitely deserve a sweet treat this week. 

Do you have any exam rituals in your house?  Any pre- or post-exam food favourites? Personally I don't really care what I eat after an exam as long as I have a big breakfast involving oats and bananas for breakfast beforehand.

Cycling in the Olympic Park

It's the time of year where I think about pulling my bike out from under its covers and using it again.  I am strictly a fair weather cyclist, and I would never dream of combining lycra with a bike.  I know - with some sort of spooky sixth sense - that it would not be a good look for me.

Graham and I went for a gentle, pottering sort of ride around the Olympic Park last weekend; now formally known as the Queen Elizabeth Olympic Park and fully open to the public once again.  It's a very big place, and we wanted to have a good explore and get to know our way around this new part of our local neighbourhood.  The aquatics centre opened a couple of months ago, and now hundreds of acres of parkland and the velopark are open too.  There are only a few more bits still to open (the Hockey and Tennis Centre next month, the Canal Park towards the end of this year and finally the stadium in 2016).

The velopark is the section closest to our house; it takes me just four and a half minutes to cycle there.  The indoor race track, the outdoor 'road' track and the BMX trails are all open at the velopark, and anybody can book a session and ride.  You can even hire a bike and take lessons if you want to.  There will be a massive network of mountain biking trails opening too later this year.  For now, I just wanted to stop off (there are plenty of bike racks outside, of course!) and have a look round.  We wandered into the velodrome and sat down for ten minutes to watch a local cycling club do some time trials.  I really want to have a go at track cycling, and I am totally going to book one of their taster sessions once I have settled into my new placement.

 

There is a very friendly branch of Cycle Surgery in the ground floor of the velodrome, and they didn't look even slightly fazed when I wheeled in my enormous sit-up-and-beg bike (with basket, obviously) to get a new tyre put on.  Admittedly my bike did look a little ordinary next to the shiny, sleek racers they had on display.

There's a cafe upstairs, where you can drink coffee and watch what's going on on the track below while the mechanics fit your new tyre.  Or you could walk round the corner to the Unity Kitchen Cafe and then sit outside under a tree for twenty minutes with a cup of coffee and a croissant, listening to the sound of birds in the trees and children enjoying one of the enormous new playgrounds, and just try and remember the polluted, industrial wasteland that was in the same place just ten years ago.  It's getting increasingly difficult to do.  Our part of East London was utterly transformed by the 2012 Olympics, and have to pinch myself sometimes when I think that all this splendour is now just four minutes away by bike.